Melissa Boyd

Unconditional love means no strings attached. Love is the thing that we all are reaching for and trying to feel in our lives? Love can be hard and heavy but it can be beautiful and magical. The ultimate way to cultivate the feeling of unconditional love is to first have self love. I’m turning 50 this month and what I have learned, mostly the hard way, is that LOVE starts with self.

My birthday gift to you is 50 Tips For Self Love. I hope you find at least one or two ways you can love yourself more.  

1. Repeat after me, “I am enough!” You are your best resource and trying to spread yourself too thin will deplete your shine~ Honor your amazing spirit
2. Massage your hands
3. Massage your feet 
4. Drink more water and say happy words to yourself as you do – I love using adjectives! Amazing, terrific, caring, deep listener ect.
5. Take a bubble break – always take a break to blow bubbles, it creates a playful heart 
6. Drink detox and caffeine-free teas that promote rest and digestion 
7. Soak in a tub for at least 20 minutes twice a week 
8. Create a Joy Jar- Write on little pieces of paper things that spark joy in your life – it can be anything at all like hummingbirds, a light spring rain, your wife 
9. Mirror mantras – repeat positive affirmations to yourself in the mirror and smile while doing it. This creates a connection between the you, the I and the Ego Me. A great way for reflective discovery 
10. Do seated twists daily to rinse out the issues in your tissues 
11. “Do not push the river” this is one of my favorite sayings from Ralph Blum’s Viking Runes. Allow the river to flow as it is -you don’t need to go into hyper speed- if something is not ready, be patient 
12. Read poetry aloud, it is soothing to heart and mind 
13. Be your own DJ – pick the songs that lift you up and commit to listening to them at least once a week. When I was a DJ in Boston, I loved to watch music lift people up out of their chairs like dancing balloons!
14. High-five yourself in the mirror 
15. Buy yourself flowers 
16. Do two random acts of kindness weekly and try to not get caught- this is a way to add your zest into the world and grow your philanthropic wings
17. Forgive yourself more often
18. Listen to that voice inside your heart space and follow it
19. Get a massage once a month, once every quarter or at least twice a year 
20. Open up the space between your toes, it often holds doubt and worry
21. Lean your whole back body into a wall or surrender to the floor and feel the power of your spine
22. Receive a compliment with a “thank you”, no arguing
23. Own your Yes’s and No’s, do what you feel you can when you want to – do not allow yourself to be bullied or guilted into a task that hurts your soul 24. Follow your curiosity, pledge to be a lifelong learner
25. Do Butterfly Taps – take your right hand to your left shoulder and left hand to right shoulder and start to tap back and forth to thank your body for being alive
26. Honor your voice – use your words wisely
27. Let go of  saying “I’m sorry” when it comes from a place of lack 
28. Say three things you are grateful for each night before you sleep and let those happy thoughts dance in your dreams
29. Give yourself permission to pause – life is a process not a destination
30. Listen to a guided meditation to open your heart
31. Practice loving kindness 
32. Sleep in..when you can.. rest and renewal make a better you
33. Invite the wind to take a walk with you and be surprised at the magic you feel in the moment
34. Write yourself a letter every year on your birthday to celebrate how terrific you are
35. Forgive a friend or a family member who has hurt you – even if its in a letter you never send – allow space to open in your heart
36. Walk outside at least twice a week if you can for heart health
37. Take vitamins or supplements like D, C, B-complex for immune boosting support for your health and longevity
38. Take a social media break to let your brain rest – this helps with anxiety and mental angst
39. Do not explain yourself to others – be unapologetically you 
40. Let go of comparing yourself to others- honor your greatness
41. Clean out that clutter – let go of clothes from your closet, papers, emails and even stale relationships hanging out in your life – spring clean so you can shine inside and out
42. Be kind to yourself and others
43. One day a week take a vow of silence even if it is for 2-4 hours – allow your whole body to rest and not be going
44. Take a vacation  – one of the biggest wishes from the other side, they wish they took time to take time
45. Volunteer – it helps you connect with causes and people who matter
46. Count your blessings often and deeply 
47. Cry More – crying helps to release old stuck energies and allows flow to your nervous system  
48. Be open- never say never and allow miracles to manifest
49. Dance with a butterfly – move with these beautiful beings when they grace your path
50. Celebrate the unique being that you are